


Temerate

by AnaliseGrey



Series: Liminal Set [3]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Episode: c02e072 Clay and Dust, Fjord's backstory, Gen, Prompt Fill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:27:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22295539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnaliseGrey/pseuds/AnaliseGrey
Summary: He doesn’t really remember it, is the thing.
Series: Liminal Set [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1603309
Comments: 4
Kudos: 41





	Temerate

**Author's Note:**

> _Temerate_ \- to break a bond or promise

He doesn’t really remember it, is the thing.

He remembers the storm, the waves crashing against the sides of the ship, the winds whipping the rain and sea spray near-sideways in the gale. He remembers the flash of lightning and boom of thunder, echoed just seconds later by the concussive force of the explosion that tore the ship apart.

All _that_ he remembers.

He doesn’t remember hitting the water.

He doesn’t remember the flare of searing heat that caused the scarring along his back, the sting and stab of shrapnel embedding in his flesh.

He doesn’t remember drowning.

He doesn’t recall making a deal, though it’s obvious he did. That Uk’atoa found a way in, made a place within him, took up space in a way that Fjord found he wasn’t entirely comfortable with, even as he woke on a beach, sand stuck to wet skin and a barnacle-encrusted sword laying next to him, a voice echoing in his mind, exhorting him to **_Learn_**.

It’s amazing how long a person can ignore the fine print when they’re busy enjoying the benefits of a deal, however poorly struck.

It takes him longer than it should, and it’s something he’ll have to live with, however long that is, to figure out precisely how poor a deal this is, before he begins to wonder whether it’s something he can make it out of alive. Because while he’s been willing to do a lot for power, there finally comes a point that he has to stop, and take a good look at himself, and ask the question: How far?

How far is too far? How far is he willing to go, what is he willing to do to maintain the status quo?

His friends encourage him, offer their assistance where they can, but ultimately it’s up to him. He has to decide what his limits are, where the line is where he stands his ground and says, ‘ _No. No further.'_

For all his proclivity for water and love of the sea, he didn’t expect to find his answer at the bottom of a volcano.

There comes a point, he thinks, as the tip of his blade slides another inch into his chest, that when a bargain is no longer beneficial, is in fact _detrimental_ , that it’s time for it to end, to cut his losses and run.

The sword hits the surface of the lava pool with a metallic _clink_ , skittering across before coming to a stop with a quiet hiss. The steam around him parts, the blade starts to sink, and the rush of relief is a near physical thing, the edge of hysteria over what he’s done still just a faint inkling at the edge of his mind. He didn’t know if he’d be strong enough to do it, strong enough to willingly make himself vulnerable, willingly make himself powerless, but when it came down to it, when it mattered, he did it.

And in this moment, he’s free.


End file.
